Failure to Launch by Mark McConville Ph.D

Author:Mark McConville, Ph.D.
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2020-01-06T16:00:00+00:00

My point isn’t that you necessarily shouldn’t be doing these things. But I want you to look at the gap between your family handbook (your spoken expectations, usually offered in the form of lectures) and your actual operating system (the messages conveyed by what actually happens). If you find a significant gap, you may be unwittingly participating in your transitioner’s problem behavior.

How to fix this will depend upon your unique situation and individual child. Sometimes it’s better to set aside the handbook when belaboring your expectations serves only to alienate your transitioner from influence. Other times—and this was the case for Gordon’s parents—it’s advisable to adjust your operating system such that it supports the life lessons you want your transitioner to learn. I can’t tell you what you’ll see when you look in the mirror, but by doing so, you’ll be in a much better position to make the difficult parenting decisions that struggling transitioners require.

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